Personal Power to Heal, Lead, Grow, and Live Your Best Life

Ignite Your Personal Power

Your Best Life

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How Do You Talk to Yourself?

How critical are you when you carry on a conversation with yourself?  Are you positive?  Are you negative?  Are you compassionate?  Are you challenging?  Are you looking for fault and heaping on criticism?  Are you praising yourself when you accomplish a particularly challenging task?

If you’re like most people, you’re probably pretty harsh with yourself when you mess up.  And you don’t celebrate or even acknowledge the milestones that took so much effort to reach.  You’re not alone.  Expecting perfection is becoming the norm – people can be quick to jump on any imperfection and be vocal in their displeasure with anything that doesn’t live up to their expectation of perfection.

How have you decided to deal with the negativity when it burrows into your brain?  Negative self-talk is one of the most limiting behaviors you can pick up and it can quickly take over your thoughts and your idea of yourself and the value you provide to the world.

 If you’ve noticed that negative self-talk is becoming more and more ‘normal’ inside your head, here are some tips to consider.

1. Distinguish between negative thoughts and critical thinking.
We all need a mechanism to analyze and make quality decisions.  We may need to determine: our next course of action; whether our latest decision was the right one; whether we need to make a course correction; whether our actions or speech was appropriate or inappropriate.  A certain amount of self-critique is necessary. However, it’s importance to recognize when that self-critique becomes non-productive – or even destructive – negative self-talk. Are your thoughts leading your toward a better outcome, or down a path of blame and depression.

2. Accept failure.
If you’ve never failed, chances are you’ve never stretched yourself to attempt something new.  If you want to grow, if you want to change your life or business, get comfortable with failure.  Think of it as a new lesson learned, critique the failure, make a course correction, and attack it from a new angle.  Don’t attach emotion and self-worth judgments to whatever failed.  Think of yourself as a toddler learning to walk.  And falling down repeatedly.  If the toddler never tried again, he’d spend his life crawling or being carried everywhere – or staying in one spot forever.  But when he manages to actually take those steps, everyone celebrates!  You’re a toddler.  You will fail.  Deal with it.

3. Program your mind for positive thinking.
Do you have some affirmations that really resonates with you?  Do you remind yourself to use them daily?  Do your thoughts gravitate toward the worst-case scenario, or do you look for that small piece of good in a given situation?  Start noticing.  Then, when the negative creeps in, consciously redirect your thoughts to the positive outcome you desire.  The more you keep at it, the more natural it will become. Ideally, those negative things you tell yourself, will eventually be taken over by your positive affirmations and desired outcomes.

4. Limit your exposure to negative people.
Some people thrive on negativity and enjoy dragging others down with them. If you cannot avoid them altogether, spend as little time with them as possible. If you already struggle with negative self-talk, you certainly don’t need them adding more negativity. If you spend more time with positive people that build you up, your negative self-talk will naturally reduce.

5. Learn to see the good in people.
If you are always thinking negatively of others, it makes sense that you will more naturally think negatively about yourself. Being more open minded towards others will help you be more accepting of your own flaws as well.

6. Negative thinking is a choice.
Even though you have been bombarded with it since you were a child, thinking negatively is something you choose to do. Conversely, positive thinking is just as much a choice as negative thinking. Choose positive thinking. This isn’t an easy quick fix, it takes a lot of work and practice. …so start now!

7. Strengthen your feelings of self-worth and know the value you provide.
Negative thinking often occurs due to a lack of belief in yourself, or negative feelings of self-worth. Strengthening your confidence and feelings of self-worth and becoming more aware of the value you provide to the world will help you get through those times that may make you feel inadequate.  No one is perfect, but we all have talents we bring to the table.  Remember yours.  You are unique.  Celebrate the value you bring to your friends and family.  And value yourself as the wonderful individual you are.

8. Work with an Energy Healer.

Set up time with your favorite Energy Healer to address the limiting beliefs underneath your negative self-talk. You might be surprised what statements are running through your head, keeping you stuck in the past.

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Spirit, Mind, and Soul Self-Care

Does something on this list speak to you?  One simple change can create unexpected and amazing results.

  1. Begin to develop tolerance and patience. The first step to finding peace with society and improving your state of being is to practice tolerance for people and things around you that create anxiety inside your body.  When you begin to feel the stress or anxiety, take a step back and explore WHY the situation triggered the reaction.  Does it remind you of a past event?
  2. Meditate.  Schedule 5-15 minutes into your day for meditation. If you don’t like the idea of meditating, practice taking deep breaths once a day as you become conscious of your body. This can help with circulation and ease your level of stress.
  3. Volunteer.  Volunteering for a good cause helps your soul, but also provides benefit for others – a win-win situation! Find something you are passionate about volunteer your time (or money). There are thousands of charities and organizations that would love your help.  Spend a few hours at your local SPCA.  Go to a hospital and volunteer to hold the babies.  Donate time to the Salvation Army.  Collect day-old bread from grocery stores and deliver it to local food banks or soup kitchens.
  4. Write down your Thoughts.  Writing not only stimulates your brain – it also acts as a great de-stressor. Keep a journal and record your thoughts at the beginning or ending of each day. Find a journal that feels good in your hand, one that is a pleasure to see on the shelf, and that inspires you.  Invest in a well-made journal to stimulate your creative juices.
  5. Read.  Curl up on the couch or window seat with a good book. This simple pleasure can be relaxing, informative, or stimulating.
  6. Think positive thoughts.  You create your reality.  The thoughts you carry every day lead you toward your expectations.  Positive thoughts lead to positive results, just as negative thoughts attract more negativity. Surround yourself with positive energy and this energetic vibe will be infused into your lifestyle and daily habits.
  7. Plan ahead.  Life happens. Unexpected delays and obstacles can create frustration and anxiety. If you have created alternative options by thinking ahead to create a back-up plan, it will be easier to handle these annoying situations. Maybe leave the house earlier than strictly necessary to give yourself a cushion to allow for rush hour traffic – it might be nice to sit in traffic thinking “good thing I planned ahead”, rather than honking the horn and contributing to the road rage crowd.
  8. Adopt a pet.  A dog or cat can provide unconditional love and support. They will lift your spirits in more ways than can be expressed. Dogs can motivate you to exercise and are always around for a cuddle. However, before you consider a pet, make sure you have the financial security and freedom to look after the financial, physical, and emotional demands of the animal.  And if you decide they need more commitment than you can afford right now, you can always foster or volunteer with rescue group or the local animal shelter.   
  9. Be generous.  Share your knowledge, time, and wealth.  You might be surprised at the satisfaction you feel inside.  And the gratitude of the recipient of your generosity.
  10. Stimulate your brain.  Grab a crossword puzzle or enjoy the Sudoku in your morning newspaper on the commute to work. These fun little games are quick and help stimulate your brain to keep your mind sharp.
  11. Find daily alone time.  Between work, the kids, your spouse, and your friends, it might seem like you don’t get a single moment to yourself. Find that moment. This could just be shutting the doors and taking a 20 minute bath. You need to find time to reflect and relax and this is best done by yourself. If you don’t make yourself a priority, don’t be surprised if you eventually find out that you’ve lost yourself.  Or you find yourself so overwhelmed or fragile you feel like you might break.
  12. Pamper yourself.  Self-care includes getting rid of those daily kinks. A great way to melt your stress away is to pamper yourself with a deep therapeutic massage. If you cannot afford a monthly massage, then look to your spouse or partner and swap massages. Buy oil, light candles, and turn your living room into your own private spa.
  13. Drink tea.  Tea has calming powers that can do wonders for your spirit. Try chamomile or green tea and indulge in the tantalizing tastes and natural goodness.
  14. Smile and make eye contact.  Let your facial expressions do the talking. A smile and eye contact with a stranger can release a spark within you and can brighten up someone else’s day.
  15. Catch up with friends and family.  Sometimes our schedules get so busy that we simply cannot fit in time to reconnect with family and friends. It can be difficult to find a balance between between work and play. Maybe make a lunch date to catch up with your friends. It can be hard to stay in touch sometimes, but it’s important to try.
  16. Forgive.  Forgiveness starts deep within, and is one of the most important steps of self-care. It is important to find a way to forgive others, but it is even more important to forgive yourself.  Know that you did the best you could on any given day, and be gentle with yourself and your past choices.  You can create a better tomorrow from your new perspective.  Step away from that heavy burden and look toward the new future you’ve decided to create.

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Create Your Wellness Sanctuary

How can you create a home that feels like “home”? A place that you want to come back to every evening after a long day at work… Where you truly feel safe and comfortable, and can really relax and unwind… A place and a space that makes you feel peaceful, calm, and well.

There are a number of simple and cost-effective changes you can make to your home that will really help enhance your experience of your home as a wellness sanctuary.

  • One of the biggest health enhancers is to clear out all the junk.  Get rid of that stuff you no longer use, and de-clutter your living space. This will automatically give you a sense of spaciousness and relief, and will immediately help you feel more peaceful within.  You can donate your old items to a family that is in need.  You could sell some of that stuff online and make a bit of extra cash, thus increasing the wellness of your wallet as well as your home!
  • Stay organized.  Nothing ruins peace, harmony, and calm more than a cluttered house where you cannot find anything. This includes that pile of bills, and mail that is sitting unorganized in plain sight, and the piles of unread magazines that inspire guilt, stress, and helplessness.
  • Keep a clean floor. Floors that are dirty or cluttered with papers, towels, clothes, and miscellaneous junk make the whole room look unkempt, disorganized, and unsanitary.
  • Have comfortable furniture. This is key in if you want to truly relax when you get home. Furniture that looks good is great, but you will quickly regret a purchase made for looks alone when you can’t relax in your own home.
  • Remember the old adage “Cleanliness is next to Godliness”? Well, you don’t necessarily have to feel holy about it, but having a clean living space is healthy for more than just the reduction in germs and harmful bacteria.  It will smell good, look good, and feel fresh, all of which will help you to feel good when you are in it!
  • Talking of scents and smells, essential oils are a natural and health-giving way of enhancing the comfort of your home.  The scent of citrus oils adds a fresh, invigorating feeling while lavender helps you feel calm. Frankincense and myrrh are wonderful for promoting a meditative air. You can use a simple oil burner or make an air freshener with just a few drops of essential oil in a spritzer bottle filled with distilled water.
  • Another way to increase your comfort level, and therefore your capacity to relax, unwind and de-stress in your home, is to add “ambience”.  Soft music, soft lighting, candles, and beautiful art pieces can all add to a feeling of calm and tranquility.
  • Color schemes affect our mood.  Blues and greens are calming.  Reds, corals, and maroons make a room seem cozy and warm. Something to think about when you decide to redecorate.
  • Can you find one area, or room, to devote to your spiritual self? A small space, even an unused corner can be converted into a sanctuary reserved for prayer, contemplation, and connection with the Divine Source (whatever that means for you).
  • Growing living plants in the home will help keep the air oxygenated, and will introduce the presence of nature. Just remember to feed and water them!
  • Use a water filter for quality drinking water.
  • Opening some windows will help the circulation of fresh air.  It will keep your home from feeling stuffy, oppressive, and claustrophobic.
  • Growing herbs in the kitchen will bring a little bit of nature in from the outside and will help you connect to the earth in an immediate and practical way. It will also bring some wholesome nutrition to your kitchen table.
  • Natural light in your home, as much as possible, can enhance your mood and provide some vitamin D (although there is no substitute for getting outside every day).
  • Remember to laugh, spend time with, and hug those you live with, to increase the good vibes in your home.
  • If you live alone, invite family and friends over to share a meal.

Balance and harmony are key in making your home a healthy sanctuary and a beloved place to decompress.

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Auras

In the 1960s in the US, the hippie movement was maligned for drug use and free love thinking. Some made fun of the back-to-nature free thinkers of the day that claimed they could see the auras surrounding people. They claimed to see encompassing cocoons of cloud-like color which told them a lot about a person. While this may have been laughed at back then, it is not so abstract an idea today.

Your aura is a distinctive quality or sense of being which surrounds you. Living things are not the only entities which give off an aura. Places and things can and emit an enveloping presence that gives off a specific mood or feeling, because of living beings that were previously there. You may have found yourself in a place where a great tragedy recently occurred, and noticed an invisible presence that gave you negative, dark or unsafe feelings.

This may have been the aura that environment was displaying, and you sensed it subconsciously even if you couldn’t see it. Spiritualists and mystics who have spent their lives improving their receptivity to auras can readily identify the color or colors which surround many people, places and things. Different colors have different meanings, so let’s take a look at what the color makeup of your aura might say about you.

What Color is Your Aura?

Living things that breathe oxygen and are natural energy fields give off electromagnetic energy. If you have ever been around someone who made you feel uneasy, and you couldn’t place a finger on exactly why you felt that way, you could’ve been tapping into that person’s aura. The dark, negative energy the individual was giving off was instantly and unconsciously registered, and this triggered an emotional response on your part.

In some cases, especially due to massive trauma or some horrific life event, an aura can grow to as many as 30 or 40 or 50 feet from one side to the other. A person’s life force energy was so negatively impacted that their aura has exploded in size. There are ways you can cleanse your aura, and specific alternative healing practices (such as Body Code) can help return your life force energy flow to a balanced, positive state.

Let’s take a color by color look at different auras.

  • Red – People with mostly red in their aura are energetic, enthusiastic and adventurous, quick to act and quick to anger. If you know someone who is willing to try just about anything, that person probably has a red aura.
  • Orange – These social animals are fun to be around. They are also generous to a fault, happy, highly empathetic, good-natured, and may have a tendency to lose their cool quickly.
  • Gold – Beauty lovers and artists have gold auras. They may radiate love, joy, and compassion.  They love being the centers of attention, and cultivate a wide number and variety of friends.
  • Yellow – A yellow aura denotes logic and intelligence, as well as great communication skills. This person may be cheerful, charming, magnetic, analytical, sensible, and may become a workaholic.
  • Purple – Purple auras identify people that are inquiring and intuitive. They are explorers and knowledge-seekers, and have a tight-knit, limited group of friends they would do anything for. Purple auras indicate a love of and connectedness with animals and nature.
  • Pink – Pink auras surround giving, caring, loving folks. These romantics have natural healing powers and are highly attuned to their psychic attributes.
  • Blue – Great communicators have bluish auras, though a blue-only aura is rare. These people are influential, eloquent and charismatic, and are often celebrities or politicians.
  • Green – These creative people love what they do, in work and at play. They are usually highly respected and admired and have a connection to nature.

So that’s your introduction to auras – or your external energy field, if you will.  If you feel like your energy system is out of whack, or keeping you from feeling like yourself, get on my calendar.  We can begin to rebalance your energy system and create your new, improved ‘normal’. 

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Grounding – Earthing

Has anyone ever called you “grounded”? If someone says you are grounded, they are referring to you as being stable and practical. This means that no matter what life throws at you, you are capable of rebounding and letting negative experiences affect you. This type of grounding refers to the emotional or mental aspect of having a solid base or foundation.

There is another way you can be grounded, and this is rather literal. Grounding (or earthing) requires you to be physically touching the ground. Instead of being metaphysically grounded and stable, you are physically grounded to the earth. While this may seem a little odd for health benefits, there is scientific proof that being physically grounded can lead to a happier, healthier you.

A 2013 issue of the Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine discussed just how important it is to connect your bare feet with Mother Earth regularly. Their research proved that “… grounding increases the surface charge on red blood cells and thereby produces blood viscosity and clumping. Grounding appears to be one of the simplest and yet most profound interventions for helping reduce cardiovascular risk and cardiovascular events.”

Yes, remarkably enough, connecting your bare feet or hands to the earth can positively impact your cardiovascular health. Who wouldn’t like to benefit from a lower risk of developing strokes, heart attacks and other heart-related health issues? The science that proves earthing is a simple way to positively recharge your body at a cellular level continues to grow, and the benefits seem to be widespread.

Why Earthing Works

Your body is basically a moving, walking and portable lightning rod. Physicists will tell you that everything in the world and the universe is made up of energy. This means you as well. Every cell and tissue in your body has an electrical charge. If you aren’t regularly reconnecting with the electromagnetic charge in Mother Earth, you are not recharging the “batteries” in your body that can help you fight infection, inflammation, disease and other causes of physical and mental health problems.

Your body is highly charged, just like the earth is. When you enjoy skin-to-earth grounding contact, you make a very natural connection. You are a product of nature. The earth is obviously a natural being. If you consider Planet Earth as a massive charging station for human beings, and you think how frequently you have to charge your smartphone, you paint a very simplistic but clear picture of how important it is for you to practice grounding regularly.

Look at the Monkey in the Zoo

You have no doubt heard that animals taken from the wild and placed into zoos and cages almost never enjoy the longevity that their wild counterparts do. Why is this? Animal researchers believe one reason is they are constantly placed in environments where they come into contact with concrete and chain fences and living environments. They are often fed out of a plastic bowl. These are not naturally occurring realities for animals.

The byproduct of not constantly touching fresh earth for captive animals around the world is a shorter life, and a dramatically lower quality of life. You need look no further than the sad-looking monkey in the zoo to see the importance of grounding for animals, humans included.

A Few of the Benefits of Grounding

The vast majority of visits to the doctor (often as high as 90%) are because the patient is complaining about stress, or is suffering from an inflammation-related problem. The electrical recharging that occurs when your naked flesh comes into contact with earth destroys stress and inflammation-causing microorganisms. Simultaneously, you promote the development of chemicals which fight disease and illness, while also regenerating cellular growth.

You have trillions of cells in your body. They are dying all the time. The act of growing and living as a human being means these cells need to be replenished. When the negative impact of oxidation accompanies damaged or dying cells, that electro-charged process must be neutralized. This is exactly what grounding and earthing does.

For better sleep, healthier skin and hair, improved cardiovascular processes, less inflammation and stress, and other wide-ranging benefits, kick off your shoes and go for a walk. The most benefits occur when your bare flesh contacts hard earth that is in a natural environment. Look for opportunities to make a connection between your flesh and mother earth, and your mental and physical health will both benefit.

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Attract Positive Energy

When it comes to energy, we know that when you attract positive energy into your life you have a healthier mind, body, and spirit.  But the world can be a pretty negative place.  So how do you attract good vibes into your life in this busy, stressful world?  Read on for some tips to attract harmony and positive energy.

Daily Meditation

Meditation is a simple way to attract positive energy.  It’s also something you can do quickly, easily, and independently.  Take a few moments each day to center yourself, breathe deeply, and calm your mind. 

You can also use this time to set an intention for the day that helps you to relax and feel positive.  Using guided meditations can help you to get started if you’re new to this practice.

Treat Others with Kindness

It’s true that you get back what you put out into the world.  When you are kind to others, you open up the opportunity for positive energy to come back to you.  That doesn’t mean you have to be perfect.  But each day it’s a good idea to set the intention that you will treat others with respect. 

I actually set the intention to do ‘one good deed’ every day.  You’d be surprised how much a simple act like opening the door for someone or returning a stray shopping cart can improve your mood – and make the world a better place.

If you have negative feelings toward someone else, it’s a good idea to explore that and work to let those feelings go.  Those feelings tend to attract negative energy and make it hard to feel at peace.

Accept What You Can’t Control

A lot of the stress we have in life comes from trying to be in control of situations that we really can’t control.  That struggle is exhausting and it’s a no-win situation.  When you’re beginning to notice stressful feelings, try to look objectively at the situation and determine what things are within your control and what things are not.

As the Serenity Prayer says, accept those things that you can’t control and work to change the things that you can.

Live in the Present

Mindfulness is the practice of living in the present.  When you spend a lot of time worrying about the future, you set up a negative expectation.  Why bring that negative energy into your life? 

That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t think about the future and make plans.  If you don’t know where you want to go, how will you know when you get there?

But when you start to feel anxiety over the future, it’s a good idea to connect to the present moment.  For example, right now are you safe?  How does your body feel right now?  In most cases anxiety creates irrational fear, and when you connect to the present you can feel more relaxed and at peace.

Tony Robbins says that another word for ‘stress’ is ‘fear’.  Anytime you start to feel ‘stressed’ or ‘anxious’, replace the word with ‘fearful’.  Then take a few seconds to explore where the fear is coming from.  Is there a step you can take today to release the fear?  Your stress and anxiety level will lessen as you recognize the source of the fear and create a game plan to move toward a different, powerful future.